We Got Married!
We Got Married!
Planning to get married is so exciting that sometimes it can prevent us from thinking about other long-term goals. When my husband and I were dating and starting to get serious about marriage, we sat down and had a talk. I knew that I liked to save money and watch it grow in my bank account but also knew that my husband liked to spend. I made it clear that I wanted to handle the finances so that I knew where the money was going and could be in charge of creating a savings. He wanted to make sure that he still could spend money if he wanted to. We came to the agreement that he would have a set amount of money put to the side each paycheck just for him to spend. This makes sure that he won’t spend money over the budget I have planned but also lets him feel like he still gets something from all his hard work.
This is why it is important to talk about this before marriage so that you know exactly what roles you will be playing and won’t get into arguments that could have been avoided by just sitting down and talking. I am proud to say that we have been able to build a substantial amount of money in our savings which allows us to know that we will be OK if life hits us hard.
MilSpouse Money
Mission Response:
Congratulations on your marriage (beautiful wedding photo!) and great job having the sometimes-difficult conversation about money ahead of time! Financial management can be a leading cause of strain on a marriage, so it’s important to get ahead on those conversations as much as possible so you and your spouse can align, come up with a plan, and work together to reach your goals. It sounds like you were in tune with your financial differences to start the conversation, but for others who may not know clearly their own values on money nor their partner’s, we have some tools to help. Check out our values and rating worksheets. Print these out and use them as conversation starters with your spouse. You may not be completely aligned on how to manage finances, but like Mariah, start with open communication and mutual understanding. Then, work together to develop a plan that works best for your family. For more tips on being a new spouse in the military, visit our New Spouse section where you’ll see step-by-step information about military pay and benefits, financial planning considerations, videos from other spouses, and many other excellent resources to help get you off on the right financial foot!
